The Yardstick: Rangers Stink, Actual Sharks Probably Do Too but the Hockey Team is Pretty Good

I think it’ll be fun to track the league leaders throughout the season so…here

League Leaders

Mike "I don't practice" Santorelli is the Canucks goal scoring leader with 4.  Weird right? Photo: Getty

Mike “I don’t practice” Santorelli is the Canucks goal scoring leader with 4. Weird right?
Photo: Getty

Forwards

Goals: Tomas Hertl – 6

Points: Tomas Hertl – 7

Assists: Alex Galchenyuk – 6

+/-: I no longer recognize this stat

Goalies

GAA: Jean-Sebastian Gigure/Ben Scrivens – 0.00

Save %: Jean-Sebastian Gigure/Ben Scrivens – 1.000

Wins: Antti Niemi – 4

Shutouts – A bunch of different guys – 1

 

I have a few questions about this early season and I’m hoping you, the reader, can offer some opinion on the subjects.  The first question I have is:

Alain Vigneault is all like "What da haaaaiiillll" Photo: Getty

Alain Vigneault is all like “What da haaaaiiillll”
Photo: Getty

What’s wrong with the Rangers?

Seriously!  They STINK!  They’ve been outscored 20-6 and are 1-3-0 in 4 games, they’re allowing 36.2 shots per game and poor Henrik Lunqvist gave up 6 goals last night against the Ducks.  I know, I know, it’s early.  They have a new coach whose system is totally different then the last guy.  They’ve been all the way across the country from their home.  They’ll probably turn it around, but for now they suuuucccckkk.  Get it together y’all!

 

How about the Sharks?!

D’you see them?! Dey been crazy good!  Niemi’s been able to carry over his play from last season which is to say he’s been excellent.  Tomas (pronounced Tomash (thank you Drew Ramenda)) Hertl has 6 goals, four of them coming in one game.  I want to comment on his fourth goal, you know the super sick one where he scored from between his legs and behind himself.  IT. WAS. AWESOME. Yeah, sure there was a bit of hot-dogging there, but remember this:

That was a bit of hot-doggery too, but it was ALSO AWESOME. Hertl’s last goal was so good that if Joe Thornton scored it, we would have seen his dong.

Just some food for thought for all da homies out there.  Let me know what you think about all this in the comments, on twitter @TboneHockeyDogz, or via e-mail at tboneandthehockeydoggz@gmail.com.  And also get pumped for a podcast! Cause it’s happening! MONDAY BAY-BEE!

 

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